So...what happened to me during Pesach?

With every Passover season, we can learn new insights that will help us to understand and apply the “Word” to our lives. As our congregation partook in the scriptural and traditional cleaning out of the chametz (symbol of sin) in our homes, this gave us many opportunities to better understand about cleaning the sin out of our lives.

The women in our congregation had many things to share regarding their Pesach experience. When you read their stories or comments, perhaps you will find your own time to discover the uniqueness of preparing and partaking of this feast. We hope you enjoy these gems of wisdom!

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“Our First Pesach”

Our preparation for Pesach began with questions like, “Do we have to get all the chametz??) and funny moments such as the time I baked pizza on the oven-rack to which the bread dough stuck and as I pulled the pizza away, Anna (7) says, “Mom, you made a big chametz”. Anna had equated chametz with messes. How true it is that the chametz in our hearts makes a mess of our lives.

Home schooling five children, I am confronted on a regular basis with my own flesh. However, this has been the first season, appointed time, devoted to as a family asking the Lord to reveal the sin in hidden in our hearts as we begin our search in the natural to reveal the chametz hidden our home. This really gave me time to not only recognize the sin but ask God to reveal it in its ugliness that I might be broken, repent and be cleansed. As the Lord was faithful in doing this it got to where as soon as I would get some tool to clean or begin my work immediately there was brokenness. I remember reaching for the vacuum cleaner and getting on my knees to vacuum the pantry where all the crumbs had accumulated and I wept. I know that as my pantry door is nearly always open and available, my heart is open and available to the Lord, but still sin “accumulates” in the not so visible areas of my life. A lot of these areas do not receive attention because they are related to wounds or frustrations that will take time and energy to examine and allow for healing or transforming of my mind. These are the very areas that sin like infection begins to set in, whether it be perspective or attitudes, etc. These were also areas that now due to the depth and lapse of time I cannot easily deal with and move on, but will take time before the Lord. So, when the next major cleaning came and I wanted to completely move my stove to clean under it, behind it, and all around it, I had to release it to the Lord for it was impossible for me to do so. I cleaned out all the areas that I could reach and see, but then turned to the Lord as he showed me there are places in your heart that you cannot see nor reach – only I can. Again, broken I cried out to the Lord because I yearn to be whole and holy. Then I was filled with gratitude because I know that it is He who is working in me and He is faithful.

When Tuesday came, I knew that there were still areas that needed work and that I might not get to them all, but I was determined to leave time to prepare my heart for HaShem. As evening, approached I told the children to stop their tasks, to which some said, “But I haven’t finished…, I still need to…” This was tough for me as well because I knew what I had left to do, but I determined to drop it (errrgghh). I asked the children what was more important than cleaning out our house and, of course, they knew the answer as we had been talking about it for weeks. They usually take showers at night so I encouraged them to pray while showering and then spend some more time alone in quietness. Interestingly, each one wanted to take a bath. After, their mikvah they all testified of spending good time with the Lord. This turned out to be true for me as well. I am so glad that I laid down the lesser for the greater as the Lord consumed me with His presence and kindness to me in my brokenness. I knew deliverance would come.

Interestingly we had read a little parable about a butterfly earlier that day and I reflected upon how when butterflies go into their chrysalis they break down into a totally liquefied state and their organs and every part of them is rearranged. They die to be resurrected into new life as a butterfly. They labor to break out of the chrysalis so that they may have strength to fly when fully released. This season I have felt the liquefying and rearranging, the death that is taking place, but like Job “I will wait till my change comes”.

What I've learned ... and it's not yet Passover!

Nathan (my son) getting upset as he witnessed me throwing out his favorite pancake mix, cereal, and crackers: Without understanding, it's difficult to follow the precepts.

Cleaning out the pantry and not checking one thing up top I thought was ok. Sure enough, just when I finished, I thought - I better check that last thing up there - and down came tumbling some cereal pieces, falling through the layers of each shelf rung I had already cleaned - dirtying everything again! What we assume is ok in our life can be the very stumbling block which cascades down to affect others, and also undo the fruits of all our spiritual labors.

The hard-to-reach places are literally a pain in my neck! Getting sin out of our lives hurts - if we do it the right way.

Getting ready to "show" the house, which is on the market, I was doing a superficial type of cleaning one day: If you spend all your time surface-cleaning, for the approval of others, it doesn't leave much time to deep clean the crevasses of our sinful hearts.

Hoping for the definitive "get rid of this and that" list from a more experienced sister: What is sin in one person's life may not be sin to another, and you can't expect someone else to tell you what needs to be removed from your life. You have to search it out yourself. And it will take work.

Walking through the grocery store two days before Passover begins, saying in my mind, "chametz, chametz, chametz" for many of my usual purchases, left on the shelf this time: Sin is all around, in brightly colored packages, yet what benefit does it hold for us?

Explaining why leaven is "bad" (for this week of Passover!) to a 7-yr. old: Well, you know how bread is puffy? Anything with sin in it is all puffed up with pride, too, and Adonai knows what's good for us, and the things we really need in life, and the things we don't need.

The preparation seems never-ending, and I end up re-cleaning some of the things I thought were already clean! We cannot rest easy in our sins and grow complacent. There is always more to be made right in our hearts.

Hearing a worship song on the radio, "(Y'shua), Lamb of God, worthy is Your Name.You are my all in all." The tears come quietly down. And I can hardly sing his Name. HE * IS * ALL Baruch haShem

Kids trying to bring a "crumb-y" snack in a room I had just cleaned: "Are you bringing CHAMETZ in there??????? I just cleaned that room!" Others who don't share our zeal can pull us back into a sinful environment and undo any progress we have made in getting rid of it! We should stand up and resist it!

The pictures of haShem's ways show up in everything you do and in every preparation, in every thought, and in every quiet moment: His ways are eternal, His teachings are true, His nature is all around when we are still enough to SEE.

Lying in bed thinking of all the things haShem wants to change in me, bitter tears roll down my cheek. I am so unworthy. I am almost frozen into non-action by the weight of what remains, in my house and heart, to get rid of.

He is the provision for the base state of my heart and life, and He is faithful to complete a good work in me. His loving kindness endures forever.

As I was stooping inside the fridge, all shelves removed - I happened to look up and see the underside of something I thought I had cleaned (bottom of the freezer door, I think!) - and it was filthy! You get a different perspective when you bend down low... humbling ourselves before the Lord, and knowing our place before Him.

When we were all "through" cleaning for the day, a startling voice pierces through the relative quiet of the pre-bedtime hours, "MOMMY! There's CHAMETZ under there!" Wide-eyed Julia is looking at our chess table with its removable, tightly-fitted piece of glass on the top. "How does it get IN there??!!!!" Sin just gets in there, even when we do nothing to encourage it! Today we see through the glass dimly - tomorrow, we will see Him face to face.

Modified food starch. Well now, that could be ANYthing. Pitch it! Staying true to Torah requires resisting the modified teachings of the world! Lots of fillers, additives, and ingredients disguised as good - but filled with evil - rob our souls of truth.

Taking the entire toaster apart - all 25 screws - and finding I still couldn't "get to" those crumbs stuck onto the bottom of the metal parts - no matter how much I took apart! Then wondering after all that work, could I even figure out how to reassemble it????? When our lives are torn apart as a result of sin, it is nearly impossible to put it all back together - the same way. But all things are possible with Messiah Y'shua! Baruch haShem.

Having pretty much "finished" the best I could do, getting chametz out of everything - I look around, and ALL I SEE is chametz - literally in every crack and cranny that I didn't somehow see before. Some of them would require deconstruction of the floorboards and walls!!!!!! Sin is all around, and it will take exhausting but gratifying labor to get rid of it.

After cleaning all week - all month, more like it - it's nearly 2 pm and Pesach is soon to arrive....tonight! I shouldn't STILL BE CLEANING, I think to myself. It will be a frenzy now preparing the meal items for the Seder, and getting myself mentally prepared as well. We can't be about fixing ourselves when the bridegroom arrives - it will be time for the banquet of the Passover Lamb!

Come, Adonai, Y'shua!!!!!!!!!!

Experience the Meaning of Clean!

This was one Pesach that I intended to have the cleaning done long before time to start the cooking and the preparation for the Seder dinner. Well, I’m doing better, but the goal is to spread out the task so my days are not so busy and I’m not so exhausted by the time we are ready to light the candles!

Of course many of us have known for years that leaven is a symbol of sin. But, experiencing the preparation for Passover brings to light incredible analogies that relate to the sin issue we all must face. Just when I thought, “I’ve got it! I’m really getting the message through this cleaning thing,” HaShem gives me one more lesson to think on in my life. I didn’t think it could possibly surpass the lessons of last year. But, this year, we’re digging a little deeper. I pray that the insight He brings to my mind will not stop – but continue until there is no more to learn. Well…., we know that we’ve always got something new to learn. So, I suppose I’ll be learning until I take my last breath.

I pray that women and men alike will take the opportunity to indulge themselves in a bit of some Pesach tradition and clean not only the house, but all those storage areas that gather clutter … and please don’t forget the trash cans and the car! More than that, I pray that time will be spent in pondering what HaShem is trying to teach us.

I started this year by steam cleaning the carpets and I felt so good knowing that my feet were walking on ground that was clean and dirt free! I’m sure my feet got a bit dirty as I was working my way through the house, but, I cleaned my feet too when I finished! It has occurred to me that cleaning the floor is probably the last thing I need to work on next year. After all, all those little unseen crumbs can fall to the floor from the most unusual places while I’m working on the rest of the house! But, on second thought, I think a quick examination of the situation will only require a good vacuum cleaning when everything else gets clean. This part of my experience reminded me of what Yeshua said to Shimon (Peter) in John 13:10 – that it was only his feet that needed washing. When we know that we have been cleansed by the sacrifice of His blood, we still have need to return again and again for continued cleansing because of the sin that creeps up on us.

With the season of Pesach drawing closer every day, today was the day I decided to start on the fringes of the kitchen and work my way in to the center where most of the activity takes place. (Isn’t that how we approach dealing with our sin? We generally deal with the surface things first and then work our way to the more serious issues.)

The food pantry was my next target. I did some work on it years ago and rearranged the shelves to make it more user friendly. (Sometimes, we need to rearrange things in our lives to make it more user friendly, don’t we?)

This year, I thought starting with the top shelf was the smart thing to do. It’s a bit smaller and they get larger and harder to clean as you move down the pantry. After all, I knew that if there were anything there, it would fall to the shelves below. I certainly didn’t want to deal with having to redo anything! I gathered my water pail with a cleaner, my sponge, my cleaning cloths and went to work. I wiped that 1st shelf down and it was a bit dusty, (but hey…that’s understandable since I couldn’t see that high anyway.) I wiped down the items a bit and put them back in their place. No Chametz that I could see. When I went to the 2nd shelf below, there was a bit more to clean. I picked up a few items starting from right to left (You think that might be a result of the Hebrew lessons – reading from right to left?) And moved them to another area to make sure I was well organized in my attack against the Chametz removal. Oops, that leaven has got to go. (If you find a sin, toss it out quickly.) I knew that Chametz could find its way to the crevices but, there wasn’t enough on this shelf that could fall into the edges between the shelf and the wall. A quick wipe around the edges should do it. Right? I wiped and replaced the food items and moved on to the next task.

Now that I’m a pro at this, I figured there would be a bit more to deal with on this 3rd shelf and I was prepared to deal with it. But, OHE VEY! The more I moved across the shelf, I found increased evidence of Chametz! OK, it’s to be expected. This was a larger shelf than the one above. There it was….leaven, leaven, leaven. It was sitting all over the place. Remove, wipe, rinse, wipe, rinse, wipe, rinse and again for good measure. (No body would be surprised – after all, we all have those shelves in our lives don’t we?)

I just politely moved on down to the 4th shelf. E e e e e k! I think I’m getting overwhelmed, this shelf is going to take some time and I might as well check out the edges while I’m at it. OH NO! It’s all crusty and yucky! ….but wait, uh, uh….uh….I’m thinking that the shelf above has a problem. I bet there’s some of that yucky stuff stuck hiding under that shelf too and I just cleaned it! Oh well, nothing will do but to redo the shelves by removing them and get the bottoms and sides really clean. Wipe, rinse, wipe rinse. Change that water and do it again! Take that shelf out and clean it right! Ahhhh, that’s better. (Sometimes, we have to go back and take care of things we left lingering in our lives.)

This 5th and final shelf is a bit different. It slants so that the cans can lay on their side and simply roll down as you take the nearest one out. It’s quite unique and a very smart use of space. (Some of us have areas in our lives that we think are unique and a really smart use of time and space. We simply allow things to roll along thinking everything is ok.) Back to the shelf - Not much room to view what’s in the back. It’s dark back there and you can’t see much, but with those little guys (cans) moving forward, it doesn’t matter. But, when the shelf above was removed, it began to expose chametz that had fallen between the cans. I was thinking it was simple task, but the more I removed the cans, the worse it got. (I consider the food in my pantry as provision from Ha Shem. This reminded me to get out all that debris that has been rolling around and attaching itself to the things he’s provided in my life. Sometimes our abundance can be a snare if we’re not careful.) I finally took the shelf out and carried it to the sink. There was only one way to deal with this one. Too much was laying in the crevices and stuck onto the edges of the wood. I had to use a tool to pry open a piece of molding that held the cans from falling off at the front of the shelf. Boy, was that ever nasty! A good vacuum to suck out all that stubborn stuff and then a good scrubbing wash was the only way to get rid of it! (This reminded me that the Ruach needs to blow the wind of His Spirit on our lives to dislodge stubborn sin and then we need a good washing in His Word!)

OH Yea, and one more thing. When I took those last shelves off their supports, I found that one of the supports was cracked and part of it fell to the floor. Had I not taken the time to remove the shelves for cleaning, weight from those cans could have caused the whole thing to collapse. I’m not sure what kind of damage that might have done. Maybe even to innocent bystanders close to the shelf. A can on the toe can be quite painful!

I am thankful that HaShem loves us enough to uncover our sin and repair the damage so that the weight of sin will not overcome us. I am thankful that He will give us more provision, as we are found faithful with what we have. I pray that our foundations will grow strong so we can bless others.

At this point, I still have some work to do on the floor below. But, I think I get the point now. I’ll take myself to where it all begins. It begins with HaShem. He’s watching and waiting – wanting so much for us to allow him entry into all those places in our lives that we’ve gathered dust, neglected issues and hidden sin. He really does want to be that Abba – Avi Nu (our father.) I pray we will all allow Him to not only take us out of the bondage of Pharaoh, but that we will trust Him enough to enter the land of milk and honey!

Tov Pesach!